


The Short Boy in The Red Flannel and Dyed Hair

by pastelbluebirds



Category: Be More Chill - Iconis/Tracz
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Everyone Needs A Hug, Fluffy Ending, Gen, Heavy Angst, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Multiple Suicide Attempts, Not much though thankfully, Other, Rich is a sweetheart, Suicide Attempt, Triggers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-11
Updated: 2018-05-11
Packaged: 2019-04-21 10:08:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,856
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14282634
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pastelbluebirds/pseuds/pastelbluebirds
Summary: Rich is tired and believes that jumping is the best option. But someone keeps interfering. Day after day after day...AU: After the Squip incident, nothing happened. The Squip Squad hasn't yet been formed. Until one event brings them altogether.[Based off of "My R" sung by Rachie][Alternate Title: Birds Set Free]





	The Short Boy in The Red Flannel and Dyed Hair

_Step...._

_Step........_

_Step............_

_This story starts out with a boy. A boy with a snapback, red flannel, camo pants, and plain black converse. His name was Richard "Rich" Jay Goranski._ With each step, Rich's heart pounded in his chest. The pounding getting louder until it was only thing he could hear and the ache in his chest growing until he felt like his heart was about to burst through skin. All of that soon stopped when he reached the door to the roof. 'Now.' Rich thought. 'The time is now.' Rich nodded to himself as he opened the door. Today was going to be his last day. He was going to jump. But someone was there on the roof. Someone that was interfering with his plans. A boy with dyed hair. Frosted tips, to be exact. Jake Dillinger. The tall boy balanced himself on his casts, bending at the waist to lean on the railing with his forehead. Scrolling mindlessly through his phone as if this was normal. Rich clenched his fists and stomped towards his best friend. Jake perked up upon hearing heavy footsteps and carefully turned around to see Rich standing directly in front of him. Jake pocketed his phone and stared at Rich with curious eyes.

"What are you doing up here?" Rich asked, his tone angry yet stale. Demanding.

"What are _you_ doing up here?" Jake retorted, trying to turn things around. Rich scoffed and rolled his eyes.

"Don't play games with me." Rich said. There was a small growl in his voice. "Answer the damn question, Jake." He commanded harshly. Jake frowned and stared down at his best friend with creased brows, wondering if he should really tell Rich what was the problem. But he quickly became tired of the lack of noise and so he began to explain.

"I was going to jump." Jake blurted out. "That is if I could get my legs over the railing." He joked dryly with a humorless chuckle.

"Don't fucking joke about that." Rich hissed, his frown turning into a scowl. Jake sighed, his eyes fluttering close.

"Sorry." Jake apologized. "...I feel pathetic." He started. "My love life is a wreck. Chloe has been my on-and-off girlfriend since freshman year and when I _finally_ score a sweet girl like Christine, I screwed up and cheated her with an old flame. I let her slip..." Jake explained, feeling tears bubbling in the corner of his eyes.

"You're right." Rich said in agreement, nodding. "That is fucking pathetic." Rich said bluntly. Jake's eyes snapped open in surprise and he found himself staring at Rich once again, stunned. Rich huffed. "Quit it with the sad puppy dog eyes. It was your own fault. You cheated and she dumped you. You lived and you learned. So what, Christine isn't your girl anymore. At least you were happy." He said, clenching and unclenching his fists. "My heart has been broken several times and all my heartbreaks were much more brutal than yours. My first girlfriend threw all the gifts I bought her out the window and screamed in my face, saying it was my fault that we were breaking up because I was such a 'fucking fairy' and told me we could get back together once I 'fixed' myself. My second girlfriend told me that we had to break up because I couldn't please her and then proceeded to present me the numerous sext messages she sent to my ex-bestfriend. My first ever boyfriend boldface lied to me, saying that he was moving to another state when in reality he was dating my cousin behind my back. I ended up finding out about their **loving relationship** from **a post on Instagram**. From then on the heartbreaks just kept coming and coming and coming. So yes, Jake, you do look pathetic because your 'shitty' love life isn't a fucking 'wreck'! Be grateful that they're still in your life! They still talk to you. They still look at you. They still remember your fucking name and here you are wallowing!" Rich ranted angrily, keeping his voice steady. And even when he wanted to cry, Rich stayed strong. "You're really going to kill yourself when they still need you?!" Tears unevenly slid down Jake's cheeks, suddenly feeling selfish and foolish for not seeing it that way. And they weren't the only ones that needed him. "Don't be a fool." Rich advised. Jake chuckled softly, took his crutches, and began to walk away. But then he stopped by Rich's side and placed a gentle hand on top of the boy's head. Rich let out a shaky breath, his eyes fluttering close at the comforting touch.

"Thank you, Richie G." Jake said gratefully. Rich bit his lip. That nickname... "See you later. Maybe we can play some video games at my house. That 'kay with you, homeslice?" He inquired, his voice soft and hopeful.

"Yeah." Rich replied, hesitant but slightly sure. "See you later." He said quietly. Jake smiled happily and ruffled his hair.

And soon the boy with dyed hair disappeared...

* * *

"Today is gonna be the day." Rich murmured to himself, sure of himself this time. Something threw him off yesterday. As soon as Jake left...he couldn't bring himself to jump. So he "scheduled" his jump for the next day. Today. Opening the door, Rich stopped himself short when he saw someone on the roof before him. Another person was there to interfere with his plans. A short girl. Christine Canigula. The small girl was gripping onto the railing for dear life as she looked off into the distance, her leg bouncing anxiously. Almost like she didn't want to be up there... Rich huffed and strutted towards the short girl. "Why are you up here, Christine?" Rich called out to his friend, his voice gentle yet harsh. Startled by his sudden entrance, Christine spun around and pressed her back to the bars while her grip tightened on the railing until her knuckles turned white. "Don't tell me you're here to jump." He said hopefully, staring at the girl with narrowed eyes. Christine whimpered and nodded sadly. "Why would you ever want to do that?"

"B-because everything is getting so difficult." Christine replied rather lamely.

"Difficult?" Rich repeated slowly. "How so?" He asked, truly baffled and concerned.

"I can't perform anymore." She answered. "After the incident with the Squip, I realized that life was...trash. That everyone probably only sees me as the girl that can't sit still for two seconds and not the actress I aspired to be. I think I lost my spark." Christine explained. "Not only that, but I lost everyone too. I lost Jake, Jenna, Brooke, Chloe, Jeremy, Michael, and you..."

"You're kidding me, right?" Rich scoffed. Christine stared at him with wide eyes, offended and confused. "You didn't lose anyone. You're so wrapped up in play rehearsal that you can't see that everyone is around you." He explained in a stern matter-of-fact tone. "I get that play rehearsal is your life, but so are we." Rich stated. He didn't want to yell at her. She didn't need that. She needed to be nudged in the right direction. Rich needed to be much more gentle than how he was yesterday with Jake. If not then Christine might fly too close to the sun and crash. "Who gives a shit about what others think about you? We care about you and believe you are the most talent girl out there. So ignore those shitheads. We're here and we'll always be here." He told her, promising her. However he couldn't help but feel like he was lying through his teeth. Because, at this very moment, he was...

"You guys really think that?" Christine asked quietly, sniffling. Rich nodded.

"I do understand your dilemma though." He admitted, surprising the girl. "But unlike you, I lost them for good." He said sadly. Christine frowned.

"Who?"

"My family." Rich replied. "My Mom left soon after she realized the love between her and my Dad snuffed out. She ended up packing up two suitcases worth of clothes and fled in the dead of night. I know this because I caught her, but she told me not to tell my ol' man. I haven't heard from her since." He explained, struggling to keep the tears at bay. "My older brother, Robin, left for college. I don't blame him for that though. He couldn't stay at home taking care of both me and my ol' man. But my Dad... I lost him to drinking. After Mom and Robin skipped out, Dad couldn't take it and he became...different." Rich cleared his throat, keeping his voice steady. "So, yeah, I know how it feels." He added softly. "Can you please get away from edge the now?" Rich requested, extending his hand out towards the scared girl. Christine whimpered once more and took hold of the boy's hand, walking towards Rich. With a shaky breath, Christine wrapped her arms around her friend and buried her nose in his shoulder. Rich shushed her softly while his thumbs caressing the girl.

"We'll talk later today, right?" Christine asked, her voice muffled in his flannel. "At play rehearsal?" Rich chuckled lightheartedly and nodded.

"Of course." He answered, agreeing to her terms. "Later today."

"Thanks." Christine said gratefully. She then went to let go, but Rich just held her tighter. "Rich?"

"Just know if you ever feel like you're falling, there will be people waiting to catch you." Christine smiled and detached herself from him friend.

And soon the short girl disappeared...

* * *

"I can't seem to catch a break." Rich mumbled to himself. He had "scheduled" his jump for the next day—today—because after his talk with Christine...he couldn't bring himself to double-cross her. But yet another person was on the roof today. A boy with a once contagious laugh. Jeremy Heere. The lanky boy sat on the ground, his legs pulled to his chest and his face buried within his knees as he rocked back and forth. He looked pitiful. "Get up." Rich ordered as he walked towards the boy. Jeremy's head shot up and he sucked in a sharp breath when saw Rich advancing towards him. Jeremy quickly scrambled to his feet and slammed his back into the metal bars, leaning far back until it looked like he was about to flip over. Rich damn-near lost his mind. He was scared. Deeply frightened. But he masked that with anger. "Stop that!" Rich yelled angrily, quickly grabbing onto Jeremy by the collar of his shirt and pulling him. Hard. The boy stumbled and Rich continued to drag him away from the edge. "What the fuck was that for? Are you really that insane?!"

"Stop it, let me go!"

"What is up with you, Tallass?!" Rich screamed, tightening his grip. He didn't want to let go. "What is possibly so bad that you nearly _throw yourself_  off the fucking roof?!"

"I don't belong here!" Jeremy screamed back. "I'm fucking trapped!"

"Where?" Rich inquired. Jeremy went to reply. "No. Don't answer that." He quickly said. Jeremy shut his mouth. "You're a fucking liar." Rich told the lanky boy. "And you know why?" Jeremy shook his head. "Because you _do_ belong. With us! With Michael, Christine, Brooke, Chloe, Jenna, Jake, and me! Oh, let's not forget your father. The man who keeps a roof over your head. The man who puts food on the table for you. The man who found himself a decent job so you could be happy. You wanna know what my ol' man has ever done for me?" Jeremy hesitated and then nodded. "Nothing." Rich replied. "I'm the one that provides for us. I got a shitty job just to pay for the bills. Can you believe that? A teenager paying the damn bills. What a joke. I'm the one that buys the food and cooks the meals. I'm the one that cleans and keeps the damn house fucking spotless. I'm the one that keeps the lights on and the water running. Hell, I even slip my hard earned money into that bastard's pocket, even though all he ever does with it is spend it on cheap beers!" Rich didn't know when they both started crying. He didn't know when Jeremy pulled him into a hug or when he started sobbing into the lanky boy's shoulder. He didn't know when Jeremy started apologizing, but he didn't care. "Please be grateful..." Rich requested weakly.

"I will." Jeremy said, but Rich shook his head in disbelief. He needed more than that.

"Promise." Rich said. "Promise me you will."

"...I promise." Jeremy swore, giving the other boy what he wanted. "I promise, Rich, I promise."

"You do belong." Rich added, making sure Jeremy knew that.

"I know that now." Jeremy said. Rich sighed in relief and relax in the strong embrace. Rich was thankful. Because Rich knew that Jeremy would keep his promise. "We'll hang out later today. After school." Jeremy suggested. "Take a break, the two of us."

"I will. We will." Rich said, taking his offer. "A break would be nice." He mumbled. Jeremy smiled and slowly removed himself from Rich's grasp.

And soon the boy with the once contagious laugh disappeared...

* * *

It was a disturbing routine for Rich. Something that he shouldn't be used to. After talking his friends out of jumping, Rich would follow them off the roof minutes later. He would then continue on with his day and reschedule his big jump for the next day. The following day he would go up to the roof, only to find one of his friends there before him. On the fourth day, Rich found himself face to face with a girl. A girl with a faded smile. A smile to which used to be bright. Brooke Lohst. Her reason for wanting to jump was because she was afraid to trust anyone anymore. Afraid that she would be betrayed. Afraid Chloe would hurt her all over again. But Rich told her that she had nothing to fear. _"Chloe and you are like sisters. You guys are like two puzzle pieces. You complete each other. You're lucky to have her and she's just as lucky to have you. Have faith."_

And soon the girl with the faded smile disappeared...

On the fifth day, Rich ending meeting up with another girl. A girl with dull eyes. Eyes that used to glisten like striking daggers. Chloe Valentine. Her reason for wanting to jump was because she felt like she was just one big mistake. She messed up Christine's chance with Jake and she broke Brooke's heart. However Rich told her that was the old Chloe and that the real new Chloe could make a difference. _"The girl that did all those rude things wasn't the real you. And believe me, I know the difference between fake and real. You can let your guard down. No one is going to judge you. And if they do, fuck them. Those assholes don't deserve you. Your real friends are always here for you. Especially Brooke."_

And soon the girl with the dull eyes disappeared...

On the sixth day, Rich found himself staring eye to eye with yet another girl. A girl with a broken heart. A heart which once was whole. Jenna Rolan. Her reason for wanting to jump was because she thought nobody wanted her around. She knew that people only wanted her around for the gossip. _"You're much more than that. You might think nobody wants you around, but we do, and you know who I mean. We need you and not for the gossip. We need you because of your cool head and unique humor and easygoing attitude. You are anything and everything that anyone could have ever asked for. So, please, remember you are so much more than people let on."_

And soon the girl with the broken heart disappeared...

On the seventh day, Rich met with a brand new sight. An unbelievably scary sight that shook him to the core. Sitting on top of the railing was a boy. A boy in red. Michael Mell. The retro boy looked down at the ground below him. His grasp on the bars were loose as he swayed carelessly. Michael looked like he actually meant business and Rich didn't know if he would be convincing enough. But he would try. He would try and convince Michael to live.

"Michael!" Rich called out to the boy. Michael perked up instantly, but he didn't look back. He refused. But that was fine because Rich wasn't done yet. "Don't do this." Rich said, cautiously inching closer towards his friend. "Please don't do this."

"...Don't do what?" Michael asked. This simple question caught Rich off guard and caused him to stop. 'What are you doing?' Rich wondered why he suddenly stopped. He was so close to reaching Michael and he suddenly just stopped... 'Keep going!' Rich yelled at himself. But he couldn't move.

"Please get down."

"I don't want to." Michael replied immediately, his voice was distant and his tone was airy. He sounded like he was dreaming. Like he wasn't here on earth. "Don't you understand? I'm doing everyone a favor." He said. "I can't live like this." Michael said, and this honestly confused the other boy. "I'm just trying to stop the scars that grow." He explained, and that was all Rich needed to say. Rich felt as if his world had shifted and suddenly Michael had been replaced with someone different. Himself. Rich saw **himself** sitting on top of that railing instead of Michael. Wearing his Halloween costume. Rich stumbled and fell to his knees as he watched himself fall. He clenched his eyes shut and pressed his palms to his ears, trying to drown out the sickening splat and the terrified screaming. Rich whimpered and choked back a sob. He didn't want to be up here anymore. He couldn't... Rich felt a hand rest on his head. Strong and warm. It grounded him. And then seconds later it wasn't there anymore.

And soon the boy in red disappeared...

* * *

On the eighth day, Rich found himself alone. Nobody to interfere... With a heavy sigh, Rich trudged towards the railing. Seven days worth of conversations running through his head. Seven unforgettable conversations. All with lessons and words that he couldn't bare to part with.

_"You're really going to kill yourself when they still need you?!"_

_"Don't be a fool."_

_"You didn't lose anyone."_

_"Just know if you ever feel like you're falling, there will be people waiting to catch you."_

_"Please be grateful..."_

_"You do belong."_

_"Have faith."_

_"Your real friends are always here for you."_

_"You can let your guard down. No one is going to judge you."_

_"So, please, remember you are so much more than people let on."_

_"You are anything and everything that anyone could have ever asked for."_

_"Please don't do this."_

_"Please get down."_

But all those thoughts faded away as he came to the edge. Climbing up on the railing, Rich balanced himself. Taking off his red flannel, Rich hissed as the cold harsh air roughly brushed against his scarred skin. Taking off his black snapback, Rich let his dyed hair down and threw the hat over the side. The short boy as small as can be started to think. Pondering if anyone would miss his contagious laugh and bright smile. Wondering if anyone noticed his dull eyes and broken heart. Spreading his arms like a bird, Rich's eyes fluttered close and he prepared himself to take flight.

"RICH!" His eyes snapped opened and he looked over his shoulder to see Jake, Christine, Jeremy, Brooke, Chloe, Jenna, and Michael. His friends. They looked...scared. Forgetting exactly where he was and what he was about to do, Rich managed to twist himself around. Then he began to fall. Life seemed to go in slow motion as he heard his friends screaming his name. His eyes glossed over and he wondered if this was how he died. If this was it. But then he wasn't falling anymore.

"I got you!" Snapping out of his stupor and focusing on that familiar voice, Rich saw Michael. The retro boy practically swinging off the side of the building. Just to save him. "I got you." Michael repeated softly, grunting as he began to pull the both of them up. Rich's mind turned to mush and his heart started pounding to the point it began to hurt. At that very moment he realized something: Rich didn't want to die. Not anymore. Suddenly Rich was sobbing and begging Michael not to let go. "I'm never going to let you go." Michael assured the crying boy. " _We're_ never going to let you go."

* * *

"I never did thank you guys." Rich said one night, as he and his friends sat on top of Jenna's roof. What had been a sweet sleepover filled with ukulele song covers turned into a night of reminiscing as Brooke suggested they sit outside of the roof. Questions were met with answers and tears became reassuring words. The Squip Squad were all wrapped up in blankets, watching curiously as Rich strummed on his ukulele. A gift from long ago. "I wouldn't be here if you guys hadn't shown up when you did." Rich said, further explaining.

"We wouldn't be here if you hadn't talked us out of jumping." Jake said, and everyone nodded in agreement. Rich smiled to himself.

"I made you guys a song. Kinda short, but I still like it." He then said, surprising the group of friends. "Although I doubt its any good." He mumbled, unsure. They all began to say words of comfort and encouragement, bombarding the boy.

"Sing it, Rich."

"Oh, please sing! You just gotta!"

"You have a wonderful voice!"

"I'm sure it's awesome."

"I'm sure we'll love it."

"Please, please, please, please!"

"C'mon, I'm dying here!"

"Fine!" Rich cried out in defeat, and his friends immediately quieted down. "I'll sing." Rich said, holding up his hand before he began to tune his ukulele. Tuning and strumming the instrument until it was just right. The smile that Rich wore turned fond and his friends eagerly waited, leaning closer. And then he began to sing.  _"Now here they are, on the roof again. Eight different teens who made amends. Starting off with a boy with dyed hair and next came a short girl who was oh-so fair. Then came along was a boy who laughed, contagious and carefree, no one could surpass. After came a girl whose smile outshined the sun, it left them all beguiled. Soon came a girl with dull eyes, but now those gems light up the sky. The sixth was a girl with a broken heart, which soon turned gold and lit up the dark. Afterwards came forth a boy in red, who dressed the scars he once dread. Finally came a boy who was combined with all, his friends were his pride so he lived through the fall. All eight teens were as thick as thieves, now spread their wings becoming birds set free."_

**Author's Note:**

> While writing this I cried. Too many times. Honestly, this is the saddest piece I've ever wrote. But I'm proud of it nonetheless. Thanks for reading and I hope you enjoyed and cried me. Don't forget to comment or give a kudos down below and I'll be writing to/for you all next time!


End file.
